Terrible Ted, Bungling Wizards Owner

The Mystical Wizard Without Magic

Ted Leonsis is the owner of the Wizards basketball team and the Capitals hockey team, both hailing from the luckless sports city of Washington DC.  Located at the Center of our country’s political swamp, these two outfits serve as an apt metaphor of entrenched incompetence, organizations completely stuck in the mud.

In a combined thirty years of ownership, Ted has managed to luck into one championship between the three teams.  The Wizards have not won a championship in 40 years, often serving as a bottom dweller.  Note that the Golden State Warriors won three in a row-playing in Oakland!

After 10 years of unparalleled bungling, Leonsis finally fired his General Manager Ernie Grunfeld. Terrible Ted then went on a search for a high profile replacement, but the team is so saddled with overpriced players and second rate talent that no one with any credibility would take the job.  To do so would be like signing on as captain of the Titanic while it was in the process of sinking.

In response, Leonsis consulted with management experts.  The result of this consultation is that he announced a re organization of his team staff, which has lots of people wondering what in the world he could be thinking.  And who these experts were; (you should secretly pay them to advise your competition).

First he hired the only guy who would take the job, the current Assistant GM.  Then, he hired a guy to run planning and operations whose prior employer was the Cleveland Browns.   Anyone see a problem hiring a football guy from an even worse organization than the Wizards?  Did Ted notice the difference in the two kinds of sports?  The shape of the balls might have been a clue.  Then he hired a failed college basketball coach to be in charge of player relations.  I see this guy’s job as picking up bar tabs  and procuring choice groupies.

Not one person with any experience with a winning organization.  Curious to say the least.

As a capper to all of these puzzling moves, he has combined the male NBA team organization with the women’s BBall team that he owns.  So the GM and Coach from that team will be adding their cogent insights into the men’s team.  Example contribution:  “We think you need better players.”

The Wizard are predicted to be one of the five worst teams in the NBA next season.  My suggestion is to have the men’s team play in the WNBA, where they have a chance of finishing out of the cellar.  I am guessing the Mystics will fare no worse than the Wizards would have over in the men’s league.  This is known as cross organizational synergy.


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