The latest in hilarious hair styles
Guys, many of you are walking around with your Supercuts hairstyle, hoping against all hope that passersby are not laughing uproariously at the impact of the butchery you got 2 months ago. You are thinking, I can’t afford fifty bucks every six weeks with a real stylist, I can’t really even justify $25.00 every 10 weeks with the beauty school dropouts or recent illegal immigrants with unsharpened scissors down at the strip mall. Best to wear an old John Deere ballcap to hide the carnage. So you sheepishly skulk around, hoping no hot chicks will laugh openly at your pathetic hairstyle.
But trust me, you are far from the goofiest doof currently infesting the streets, from a hair style perspective. No, there are people who pay real money, lots of it, to make themselves look like semi finalists in the Bozo look alike contest. In other words, these people pay real money, hundreds of dollars to look completely asinine. Thanks for the laughs you morons!!!!
To me, this is one of the really fantastic things that happened in 2017. Instead of searching for laughs among late night comedians, we can simply watch the risible knuckleheads walking through the local Wal-Mart, or even better, running point for an NBA team, to feel a vast sense of stylistic hair superiority.
There was a time when hairstyles for men were strictly minimalistic. The cost of sustaining the au courant style was virtually nil, and some guys were able to achieve it without any effort at all (bald guys). This was the golden age of men’s hair styles, when you could be cool for the cost of a twenty nine cent Bic razor and some Barbasol. You could follow the ultra hip example set by Michael Jordan. Without a nazi tattoo, you are not a skin head, but a cool, shaved head dude. The only guys we laughed at during this period were those sporting mullets. (Still worth mocking to this day.)
Those days, alas, are gone. They have been replaced by hairstyles inspired by Dr Suess, dystopian sci fi flicks, and The Walking Dead. I have observed the most hysterical hair styles that I can recall in my whole life. Guys walking around looking like refugees from a zombie barber shop. Thanks for the laughs, you ridiculous mooks! And for letting more normal guys score the chicks, who have to be laughing equally if not more loudly! That’s right doofuses, the chicks are in on the joke. They are screwing guys with regular guy haircuts while you shop for robot girl friends on the dark web!
We all know that Laughter is the Best Medicine, right? OK, here is the rogues gallery of hair style currently being sported by the so called “men” of today. Have to love young guys making complete asses of themselves providing free laughs to the world. Your charity is our well being.
Let the mocking begin!!! Let’s face it everyone, these guys look like complete idiots. Their mothers throw rotten vegetables when they come home. Potential girl friends bolt to the exits when they enter a party. And real men make sure these goofballs only get lite beer and cape codders to drink at the party.
Hey idiots, get a REAL HAIRCUT!!!!
The Dust Mop
Even if you are bald, over weight, stupid, nerdy, etc. You can feel superior to these nimrods.
I feel that I have performed an important service to society, will now reward myself with a martini, shaken not stirred, Makes a difference no matter what Donald Craig says.
For the record, I sport a regular guy haircut, courtesy of my local barbershop. I claim real guy status. I spent $15.00 plus tip.